So I haven't posted in forever... Andy and I have broken up once since my last post. He had to some things straight. My birthday was May 23 and we got back together then and we've been together since. ^_^ We've had NO problems this time. Which is a good sign. Plus he is actually taking the time to get along with my dad, which isn't the easiest thing but he has gotten along with him amazingly. My little sister even likes him O.o and she hates guys.
Lynn has been having a lot of problems. She barely comes to me anymore. She is apparently moving 30 minutes away soon. idk what happened... she just stopped coming to talk to me... said she didn't wanna 'burden me with her problems'.
Bry has been in Texas for the summer. Sad.
Jess is engaged -_- In my opinion big mistake, but my mom thinks it is a way for her boyfriend to 'keep her under control' at college, since she is going to college in the fall.
About the only interesting things going on this summer.
Ugh!! School in a month
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Monday, February 23, 2009
2/17 to 2/23
Andy gave me his class ring! I've been wearing it on a chain around my neck so I don't loose it. Of course, he is making fun of me cause I rarely take it off but yeah :D
Bry saw it earlier today, he seemed cool about it. Thought I could kinda tell it upset him a bit even though he tried to hide it.
Went on a double date friday. It was fun. We went bowling then went and watched movies.
We plan on doing it again Saturday maybe? Don't know yet since we are going lazer tag with the youth group friday night. Probably since Jess wants to hang out again.
Soccer tryouts start next week!!! I am SUPER excited! The last couple years it has been very very hard to make the team, but this year hardly anybody is trying out, so I am around 85% sure I am making the team :)
The bible lesson went well. It only lasted 15 minutes, but everybody enjoyed it.
I've been in a very good mood the last couple weeks too. Which is nice. I feel like everything is how it is supposed to be. Which in turn, is making my mom happy. I think she was realizing I was kinda blah there for a while. She hasn't met Andy face to face yet, but she likes him a lot, which makes me happy.
3 more months til my birthday!!!! XD
Bry saw it earlier today, he seemed cool about it. Thought I could kinda tell it upset him a bit even though he tried to hide it.
Went on a double date friday. It was fun. We went bowling then went and watched movies.
We plan on doing it again Saturday maybe? Don't know yet since we are going lazer tag with the youth group friday night. Probably since Jess wants to hang out again.
Soccer tryouts start next week!!! I am SUPER excited! The last couple years it has been very very hard to make the team, but this year hardly anybody is trying out, so I am around 85% sure I am making the team :)
The bible lesson went well. It only lasted 15 minutes, but everybody enjoyed it.
I've been in a very good mood the last couple weeks too. Which is nice. I feel like everything is how it is supposed to be. Which in turn, is making my mom happy. I think she was realizing I was kinda blah there for a while. She hasn't met Andy face to face yet, but she likes him a lot, which makes me happy.
3 more months til my birthday!!!! XD
Monday, February 16, 2009
2/10 to 2/16
My goodness! Almost a week! I is sorry!
Well. Bry hasn't been happy with me at all since I told him no. We are still cool though. We still talk and joke around like brother and sister, but I still watch what I say. I don't want him to get the wrong idea.
Andy asked me out on Valentines Day. I am officially his novia (girlfriend) ^_^
I'm happy with this decision. I know if I would have gone out with Bry it wouldn't have felt right. With Andy it feels right. I know Bry is still hurting cause of this, even more now. Which has both me and Andy saying no PDA around him. Just so we don't make it worse around him.
What is worse is that Bry was starting to talk to our friend Taylor. Taylor likes Bry a lot, but she admitted to me he talks about nothing but me still... I wanna nock the boy senseless. Taylor is an amazing girl. She is 5 times better for him than me and I wish he would realize that. Plus she actually likes him! And I know he likes her cause he told me, but he is to caught up in me...
Hopefully Bry will get the picture soon. Andy and I don't plan on breaking up anytime soon. Since this relationship seems to be the first for me that actually feels right, and the same for him.
Well. Bry hasn't been happy with me at all since I told him no. We are still cool though. We still talk and joke around like brother and sister, but I still watch what I say. I don't want him to get the wrong idea.
Andy asked me out on Valentines Day. I am officially his novia (girlfriend) ^_^
I'm happy with this decision. I know if I would have gone out with Bry it wouldn't have felt right. With Andy it feels right. I know Bry is still hurting cause of this, even more now. Which has both me and Andy saying no PDA around him. Just so we don't make it worse around him.
What is worse is that Bry was starting to talk to our friend Taylor. Taylor likes Bry a lot, but she admitted to me he talks about nothing but me still... I wanna nock the boy senseless. Taylor is an amazing girl. She is 5 times better for him than me and I wish he would realize that. Plus she actually likes him! And I know he likes her cause he told me, but he is to caught up in me...
Hopefully Bry will get the picture soon. Andy and I don't plan on breaking up anytime soon. Since this relationship seems to be the first for me that actually feels right, and the same for him.
Monday, February 9, 2009
2/4 to 2/9
Wow. I didn't realize 5 days already went by. SO MUCH has been going on...
Andy broke up with his gf. She seems upset and mad at him from what he told me, idk, but he said it was what she wanted she just didn't like the way he broke up with her. In the hallway...
He started flirting with me again. He admitted he never got over me... I don't know what to do. I never did either, but now there is something else standing in our way. Bry....
Bry asked me to be his gf Thursday after school. I paniced... Bry is like my brother. Twin brother... I can't see myself date him. At all. I upset him. I know I did, but I wasn't going to say yes just to make him happy. Why would I go into an empty relationship?
But Andy knew... and still flirted with me Saturday... I'm afraid I'm getting between these 2 now cause Bry knows I like Andy and not him... He also knows Andy likes me back. Nothing is going on between me and Andy really except flirting back and forth and sometimes he holds my hand, but nothing really past that...
We had a Discipleship weekend. AMAZING!!! I bonded with some of the girls from my youth group. It was really nice. I sat down and held hour long convos with some of the girls i've only ever said no more than hi to. It was really nice.
Not much else is going on besides that I'm now stuck in a love triangle with Andy and Bry... They are both best friends too... Hopefully Bry will realize I'm not right for him... far from it... he wants to be a preacher... my faith isn't as strong as it should be. I don't think I'm right for him. There is somebody else who is though, and I hope he realizes that...
Pray for me though please DJ and Lizzy and any of my other gaia girls who read this. I really need it. I just don't know what to do or were to go. I know what I want, but I don't know what is right...
Andy broke up with his gf. She seems upset and mad at him from what he told me, idk, but he said it was what she wanted she just didn't like the way he broke up with her. In the hallway...
He started flirting with me again. He admitted he never got over me... I don't know what to do. I never did either, but now there is something else standing in our way. Bry....
Bry asked me to be his gf Thursday after school. I paniced... Bry is like my brother. Twin brother... I can't see myself date him. At all. I upset him. I know I did, but I wasn't going to say yes just to make him happy. Why would I go into an empty relationship?
But Andy knew... and still flirted with me Saturday... I'm afraid I'm getting between these 2 now cause Bry knows I like Andy and not him... He also knows Andy likes me back. Nothing is going on between me and Andy really except flirting back and forth and sometimes he holds my hand, but nothing really past that...
We had a Discipleship weekend. AMAZING!!! I bonded with some of the girls from my youth group. It was really nice. I sat down and held hour long convos with some of the girls i've only ever said no more than hi to. It was really nice.
Not much else is going on besides that I'm now stuck in a love triangle with Andy and Bry... They are both best friends too... Hopefully Bry will realize I'm not right for him... far from it... he wants to be a preacher... my faith isn't as strong as it should be. I don't think I'm right for him. There is somebody else who is though, and I hope he realizes that...
Pray for me though please DJ and Lizzy and any of my other gaia girls who read this. I really need it. I just don't know what to do or were to go. I know what I want, but I don't know what is right...
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Almost a Week O.O (1/31 to 2/3)
Couple days have gone by since I've posted anything.
Well. Saturday my friend May had a ultimate frisbe compotition in the snow. FUN! Andy came, he was in a good mood which was good. But we hung out after and watched a couple movies. So Saturday was pretty cool.
Sunday was Sunday. Andy and I went over to Bry's for Super Bowl Sunday. Steelers won. Didn't really care who won, but it was a good game.
Monday had a indoor game. Jess and Andy came. We lost :( and I could shoot worth my life monday. I did make one goal though. That was cool. But now Andy is saying he will be helping me with my shooting just so we make sure I make the team during tryouts next month.
Only 12 spots open D:
Today was kinda eh. Nothing really interesting. Andy almost broke up with his gf, but couldn't and ended up talking to her. He was in a very good mood this afternoon so that is good.
Tomorrow we have an assembly so short classes. YAY!
And 3 more days til the weekend church retreat thing!!! I'm excited! But I'll be gone all weekend so no gaia this weekend :(
Oh, and DJ. Thank you for the tips for the lesson. I talked to a friend of mine and he said I should go talk to the youth pastor cause I've never taught a lesson and I've never been in a real youth teaching environment until a couple months ago. I still might do the lesson but see if he can help me.
I was thinking about doing a lesson on Placing all Faith in God or something like that so those stories helped! Thank you ^_^
A friend of mine wants me to do one about how Life is Special, but I think I might do the Faith even though we have been talking about it a lot in Sunday school lately. *shrugs* Oh well XD
Well. Saturday my friend May had a ultimate frisbe compotition in the snow. FUN! Andy came, he was in a good mood which was good. But we hung out after and watched a couple movies. So Saturday was pretty cool.
Sunday was Sunday. Andy and I went over to Bry's for Super Bowl Sunday. Steelers won. Didn't really care who won, but it was a good game.
Monday had a indoor game. Jess and Andy came. We lost :( and I could shoot worth my life monday. I did make one goal though. That was cool. But now Andy is saying he will be helping me with my shooting just so we make sure I make the team during tryouts next month.
Only 12 spots open D:
Today was kinda eh. Nothing really interesting. Andy almost broke up with his gf, but couldn't and ended up talking to her. He was in a very good mood this afternoon so that is good.
Tomorrow we have an assembly so short classes. YAY!
And 3 more days til the weekend church retreat thing!!! I'm excited! But I'll be gone all weekend so no gaia this weekend :(
Oh, and DJ. Thank you for the tips for the lesson. I talked to a friend of mine and he said I should go talk to the youth pastor cause I've never taught a lesson and I've never been in a real youth teaching environment until a couple months ago. I still might do the lesson but see if he can help me.
I was thinking about doing a lesson on Placing all Faith in God or something like that so those stories helped! Thank you ^_^
A friend of mine wants me to do one about how Life is Special, but I think I might do the Faith even though we have been talking about it a lot in Sunday school lately. *shrugs* Oh well XD
Friday, January 30, 2009
Thursday/Friday (1/29, 1/30)
It's the weekend! yay! Well, had school the last two days.
Thursday was actually kind of fun and I always dread thursdays. We did a fake trail for Louis XVI in class. I was De Seze (King's attorney). That was fun. I apparently did really good. Nobody could say anything after I said something wrong about their accusation towards Louis (My friend Steve) ^_^
Had a suprise indoor game. Reopened the 'burns' on my right knee from when I fell Monday.
Today was kinda eh. Day went by slow. Kinda a resting day for me. Relaxing.
Hoping there is something to do tomorrow. But Bry is working all day tomorrow so unless Jes goes to hang with her bf and his friends and I can go to, I dout I'll be getting out of the house.
Thursday was actually kind of fun and I always dread thursdays. We did a fake trail for Louis XVI in class. I was De Seze (King's attorney). That was fun. I apparently did really good. Nobody could say anything after I said something wrong about their accusation towards Louis (My friend Steve) ^_^
Had a suprise indoor game. Reopened the 'burns' on my right knee from when I fell Monday.
Today was kinda eh. Day went by slow. Kinda a resting day for me. Relaxing.
Hoping there is something to do tomorrow. But Bry is working all day tomorrow so unless Jes goes to hang with her bf and his friends and I can go to, I dout I'll be getting out of the house.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Tuesday/Wednesday
OMG 2 SNOW DAYS IN A ROW!!!!
It's rare enough we even get 1! To bad I was stuck at home yesterday cause it hurt to walk. Stupid fake too so.grass. Now today Bry is working from 2 to 5, Jes is with her bf i think (haven't heard from her), Lynn is still on lockdown (BOO), and Andy... who knows what Andy is doing...
Yesterday = EXTREME boredom
Mostly cause I couldn't walk D: but I can walk today! YAY! ^_^
Today, well. Seems to be going about as well as yesterday. Wish somebody would call but I dout it. *sighs* AND I think there is no youth tonight D:
Now I'm kinda looking forward to school tomorrow.
Well, it's still only 3. Maybe somebody will call. *hopes*
It's rare enough we even get 1! To bad I was stuck at home yesterday cause it hurt to walk. Stupid fake too so.grass. Now today Bry is working from 2 to 5, Jes is with her bf i think (haven't heard from her), Lynn is still on lockdown (BOO), and Andy... who knows what Andy is doing...
Yesterday = EXTREME boredom
Mostly cause I couldn't walk D: but I can walk today! YAY! ^_^
Today, well. Seems to be going about as well as yesterday. Wish somebody would call but I dout it. *sighs* AND I think there is no youth tonight D:
Now I'm kinda looking forward to school tomorrow.
Well, it's still only 3. Maybe somebody will call. *hopes*
Monday, January 26, 2009
Sunday/Monday
Starting with Sunday... I saw Lynn during morning and evening service. It was nice seeing her and hanging out with her for a bit.
Youth pastor says I get to teach Wednesday Study in 3 weeks D: I gotta find something to teach! Maybe something on Foul Language, or just plainly put, Putting Faith in God? idk... Any ideas? I would love some! I wanna be prepared at least a week in advanced D:
Andy had an emotional breakdown... He told me I kept him from breaking down during morning service (he sat next to me). He ended up asking me to go to evening service for support. Which I did... idk how much 'support' I was though. *shrugs* We went home that night and I got on messanger and he said he gf didn't seem to wanna talk to him which upset him big time... in turn upset me big time.... why am I so attached to him? What does God got planned for him in my life? There must play some important role in my life, because i don't think we would have gotten to this point in our friendship esp. after what happened...
Well. Today was Monday.
Andy and Jes was supposed to come to my indoor soccer game today. Andy didn't... but maybe that was because his gf was finally talking to him again and was happy to be around him again (found out through text)... still it kinda hurt. I know him and his gf seem to be getting along but he had still made plans to come to my game. Couldn't he have come to my game? He sees his gf everyday... w/e he chose not to come... I hope he had fun with her.
Jes came though :) it was nice to see her. AND her bf was there (cause he is on my team (coed teams)) and she almost ignored him the whole time to hang out with me. Sounds bad yeah but she is ALWAYS with that boy!!!
My game went good though! I haven't played that well in a long time!! We won 10 to 6 and I made almost half the assists. I almost made 3 goals too, but 1 I 'choked', 1 I missed an OPEN goal *head bonks*, and one the goalie got *shrugs*. The only bad part is that now my knees are all banged up. I slid accross the fake grass because of course clumsy me has to fall once every game lol
New guy at school too!! Well... not new to most of the soccer players but new to me! I thought I knew everybody who played soccer. I thought I knew everybody in my grade level, but I guess not. He is kinda cute. He looks at me in the corner of his eyes when he doesn't think I'm looking, and I don't think he notices that I know he is. Hehe. Maybe we'll get the chance to talk sometime. He seems kinda funny. It might be nice meeting somebody from my school that I won't already have an idea on how they act. Hmm... one can only hope right?
Youth pastor says I get to teach Wednesday Study in 3 weeks D: I gotta find something to teach! Maybe something on Foul Language, or just plainly put, Putting Faith in God? idk... Any ideas? I would love some! I wanna be prepared at least a week in advanced D:
Andy had an emotional breakdown... He told me I kept him from breaking down during morning service (he sat next to me). He ended up asking me to go to evening service for support. Which I did... idk how much 'support' I was though. *shrugs* We went home that night and I got on messanger and he said he gf didn't seem to wanna talk to him which upset him big time... in turn upset me big time.... why am I so attached to him? What does God got planned for him in my life? There must play some important role in my life, because i don't think we would have gotten to this point in our friendship esp. after what happened...
Well. Today was Monday.
Andy and Jes was supposed to come to my indoor soccer game today. Andy didn't... but maybe that was because his gf was finally talking to him again and was happy to be around him again (found out through text)... still it kinda hurt. I know him and his gf seem to be getting along but he had still made plans to come to my game. Couldn't he have come to my game? He sees his gf everyday... w/e he chose not to come... I hope he had fun with her.
Jes came though :) it was nice to see her. AND her bf was there (cause he is on my team (coed teams)) and she almost ignored him the whole time to hang out with me. Sounds bad yeah but she is ALWAYS with that boy!!!
My game went good though! I haven't played that well in a long time!! We won 10 to 6 and I made almost half the assists. I almost made 3 goals too, but 1 I 'choked', 1 I missed an OPEN goal *head bonks*, and one the goalie got *shrugs*. The only bad part is that now my knees are all banged up. I slid accross the fake grass because of course clumsy me has to fall once every game lol
New guy at school too!! Well... not new to most of the soccer players but new to me! I thought I knew everybody who played soccer. I thought I knew everybody in my grade level, but I guess not. He is kinda cute. He looks at me in the corner of his eyes when he doesn't think I'm looking, and I don't think he notices that I know he is. Hehe. Maybe we'll get the chance to talk sometime. He seems kinda funny. It might be nice meeting somebody from my school that I won't already have an idea on how they act. Hmm... one can only hope right?
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Life...
So here I stand, watching all my friends lives fall apart. My own problems don't even seem important to me anymore. Yeah sure, my family is a wreck, at least my mom's side of the family is. But it doesn't even seem important right now.
Lynn, poor little Lynn. My 'lil sis'. Her and her aunt aren't gettin along, at all. They fight all the time and she came to school crying. I thought things were finally getting better. Guess again I guess...
Andy... I can't believe me and him got our friendship back. After what happened between me and him and everybody tellin me to just walk away from him. But now, his gf is hitting him hard it seems. She might be breaking up with him. He is suck a mess. He started crying the other night when we were hanging out. Out of all our friends, I was the only one who knew what was wrong. He told 1 other person what was wrong after I left that night, but still, seeing him cry hurt me. I can't believe she is doing this to him. Does she not realize what she has right in front of her? How lucky she is to have a guy like him? I don't even know how I feel about this whole thing. Earlier, I wanted her to break up with him. What comes around goes around. I wanted him to know what I went through when he hurt me. But as I sat there talking to him, trying to talk to him. Trying to help him in some way, my whole body ached and I felt like I was melting away from guilt. I don't want to see him in the pain he is in. I don't want her to break up with him, I want him to be happy. Thats all I want. I want to see the smile on his face again, the one that makes my heart shutter, even if his smile isn't for me.
Yeah sure, other friends have their own problems, but these two are affecting me the most.
Gaia doesn't even seem important anymore sadly, maybe thats why I only get on once a week anymore. I miss talkin to DJ, Stormy, Lizzy, and a few others, but the problems with my family, and my two friends just sucks up most of my time and energy and whatever I have left goes toward homework. Life is just a big bunch of stress, I wish things would get easier, but I don't think they will...
(( Note: Names are not real names. Just to help me so I don't say he she all the time. Yeah, these are my problems... idc anymore if people I know ever lay eyes on this or not... i just can't hold everything in anymore ))
Lynn, poor little Lynn. My 'lil sis'. Her and her aunt aren't gettin along, at all. They fight all the time and she came to school crying. I thought things were finally getting better. Guess again I guess...
Andy... I can't believe me and him got our friendship back. After what happened between me and him and everybody tellin me to just walk away from him. But now, his gf is hitting him hard it seems. She might be breaking up with him. He is suck a mess. He started crying the other night when we were hanging out. Out of all our friends, I was the only one who knew what was wrong. He told 1 other person what was wrong after I left that night, but still, seeing him cry hurt me. I can't believe she is doing this to him. Does she not realize what she has right in front of her? How lucky she is to have a guy like him? I don't even know how I feel about this whole thing. Earlier, I wanted her to break up with him. What comes around goes around. I wanted him to know what I went through when he hurt me. But as I sat there talking to him, trying to talk to him. Trying to help him in some way, my whole body ached and I felt like I was melting away from guilt. I don't want to see him in the pain he is in. I don't want her to break up with him, I want him to be happy. Thats all I want. I want to see the smile on his face again, the one that makes my heart shutter, even if his smile isn't for me.
Yeah sure, other friends have their own problems, but these two are affecting me the most.
Gaia doesn't even seem important anymore sadly, maybe thats why I only get on once a week anymore. I miss talkin to DJ, Stormy, Lizzy, and a few others, but the problems with my family, and my two friends just sucks up most of my time and energy and whatever I have left goes toward homework. Life is just a big bunch of stress, I wish things would get easier, but I don't think they will...
(( Note: Names are not real names. Just to help me so I don't say he she all the time. Yeah, these are my problems... idc anymore if people I know ever lay eyes on this or not... i just can't hold everything in anymore ))
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